Cuco vs The Internet

Many moons ago I had a crazy roommate. By crazy, I mean someone that had to spend several weeks in a mental hospital and was heavily medicated after that. If he forgot to take his pills, he would become more loud and destructive than a gremlin that had food after midnight. There are uncountably many stories about him, Turbo, but I will not talk about them now. I will talk about his friend, whom I will refer to as Cuco (not his real name, in order to protect his identity).

Cuco was visiting us, and crashing in the chichacatre (a mattress we had in the living room). Turbo was out of town, while I was studying, and Cuco got bored, so he wanted to use my laptop and browse the internet. Fine, as long as he lets me study.

This was back in the day where the search engine was yahoo. So, he decided to go to yahoo, and instead of doing a search, starts browsing the categories. I have never seen anyone actually browsing them for so long, after all, they just sucked. Somehow he got into the "Jokes" subsection, and I thought that should entertain him for some time. I didn't hear him type or click for quite some time (15 minutes or so), and I turn around and see him staring at the screen. The screen contained something like this: the image of a half-way done progress bar that had a caption that read "How to keep an idiot waiting."

This is a true story.

I was going to explode laughing, when he turns to me and says "There is something wrong with your internet." My previously contained laughter conventional explosion drove his statement into critical mass creating in me a nuclear explosion of laughter. I spent quite some time trying to pull myself together, but whenever I would start explaining him that it was a joke I would start laughing again.

I even remember how much my stomach hurt of laughing so hard.

Then, he decided to check his email. He would click on the address bar, and the current address would get highlighted and selected as normal. That confused him quite a bit, and told me that he wanted to get rid of the "blue thing". I told him just to delete it and write the address. He looked very confused, so I said "just type www...". And he did, effectively overwriting the previous address and typing his own. "WOW, your computer can DELETE with the 'w' key!!!".

Oh my flying spaghetti monster.