Intellectual, dude!

We met this girl who really wanted to be taken as an intellectual, but it was painfully obvious to everyone in our table that she lacked the new point of view, the life experience, the three-digit IQ, or the literacy skills to pull it off, dude. She, an English major, wasn’t smart enough to just shut the fuck up, dude. You can only talk about how people "should think outside the box, dude" for so long until you start sounding like a Taco Bell commercial, man. To sum it up, I will just quote her: "Dude, I read a lot. And that is why I have a great great great great vocabulary." [sic]